Give Love

My youngest daughter, Caitlin, turned 3 a couple weeks ago. Caitlin loves pink things, princess things, dresses, brushing hair and playing with baby dolls. She even tells us that her hair is pink. So for her birthday we decided to let her get a makeover in Cinderella's Castle at the Bibbity Bobbity Boutique and then have breakfast with Cinderella at her Royal Table. Caity had a great time and she truly did look like a princess. You coud really tell that she was enjoying having her hair done and picking out make-up and having her nails done. She was a real cutie.

I should probably tell you how the morning started, though, so my story will make a little more sense. I often tend to get overheated when I am outside in the heat for a long time, like at places like Disney World. I usually get a really bad headache and then eventually get sick. If I am very careful I can sometimes avoid getting the headache or attack it with medicine as soon as I feel it coming on. Often you hear about Satan having a hold on you. Well, I am convinced that Satan and his merry men use my headaches to keep my focus away from God. The last thing I feel like doing when I have one of those headaches is dealing with a lot of people in a hot crowded theme park. It really gets me down, but more importantly to me, it really gets my family down.

About a year ago, I decided to stop taking the daily medication that my doctor was giving me to reduce the frequency of migraines that I was having. Eventually, I stopped taking the awesome prescription medication that is available for migraines. I did this for a few reasons. 1) I was not comfortable with continually putting these strong chemicals into my body and although they worked great, I was not sure that the frequency was really becoming less. 2) The migraine pills are really expensive and they have only been approved for 9 doses per month. This costs $50 at best sometimes more. 3) I had been praying that God would help me overcome my headaches.

To make a long story short (I know that is pretty rare for me), I have been doing better, but the summertime in Florida really takes its toll on me and it becomes harder and harder to avoid getting sick.

So here I am, getting ready for my little girl's big day with Cinderella on her 3rd birthday and all I can think about is "what can I do to avoid getting sick today? I can't get sick. I have to control my headaches. I have to control my situation so I can not get overheated." Suddenly, I am hearing a new Third Day song in my head and God turns the volume up.

If you give love
I’ll return the love and you will see
So much more than you gave away
If you give love
Give it to me

God told me to stop trying to control things. Stop thinking you have any control whatsoever as to whether or not you get a headache today. God said to me, "You do what I have commanded you, by giving love to anyone and everyone you come into contact with today, and I will take care of you. Give love and I'll return the love and you will see so much more than you gave away.

You can't begin to understand how awesome it felt to realize that God was in control of my headache situation. I didn't have to worry about letting my family down by getting sick and being a bump on a log. I just needed to keep my focus on God and doing what he commanded me to do.

By the way, have you ever been to Disneyworld during the week before school starts in AUGUST in ORLANDO. The Humidity, Heat, Lack of Respect for Personal Space and yes, Body Odor is at an all-time high. Me not complaining about the circumstances at Disney is like Chandler Bing not being able to make a joke about the things his friends say for one whole day.

I was not concerned. God had given me the greatest feeling. A feeling of lightness and joy. It was unbelievable. My first challenge awaited me in the hotel room as I stepped out of the shower. It was 7:15am and I needed to find a place that sold ladies underwear in 30 minutes and on my first trip out I bought little ladies underwear instead. Apparently there is a difference.

I found myself making special efforts to give encouraging words to people that I did not know. The clerk at both drug stores, people working at Disney, other people in the park. It was a great experience and let me tell you, God returned the love to me like you won't believe. The sky was a little overcast and there were periodic light rains. The crowd really wasn't that bad. The waits in line were not bad either. And I thoroughly loved spending the day with my family (in-laws too). I think I thought about having a headache probably 3 times that day, which itself is a miracle. I also felt good enough to ride a rollercoaster, Space Mountain, with my wife and father-in-law. This was particularly important to me, because I really wanted to hear my wife laugh and have a great time. For some reason, she thinks it is funny when I ride a roller coaster, and now that I think of it, her dad was laughing pretty hard too, and so were the 3 people behind me on the roller coaster. I didn't care. I felt great and I was giving love.

My daughter had a great day and apparently she felt like cutting loose, too. When we got back to the hotel, she got to open up some of her birthday presents. One of which was a Disney Princess Electronic Keyboard. Here is what happened:

My wife got me a really cool book by John MacArthur called "Scriptures to Live By." These two verses are excellent:

"Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!" Psalm 133:1

"New commandment I give to you, that you love one another, as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13:34-35

Give love and I'll return the love and you will see so much more than you gave away.

My Sweel Little Emma

Fortunately your voice doesn't crack when you are typing. I am pretty much a basketcase about right now. You see, my oldest daughter, Emma, turns 5 on Wednesday and then graduates from pre-K next Tuesday night. I have always heard people say "watch out they grow up too fast," but now I am really finding out what it means.

I have found myself thinking back to the time when Emma was first born. I remember sitting in the rocking chair in that dim hospital room while Amy was out cold. I cradled Emma in my arms as carefully as I could. She seemed so fragile and light, yet, the weight of the moment seemed as though I were holding up a baby elephant. I remember thinking to myself, "This is about as permanent a commitment as you can get." Until the day I die, I will forever be responsible for this sweet precious baby. I got kinda panicky for a moment and wondered if I could actually handle the pressure. I wondered what made men run away from their responsibilities so often? What caused them to simply walk out on their families and turn their backs on their children?

I suppose there are a ton of excuses, but I don't believe any of them are legitimate. Don't worry though. My panick attack was short lived. Nothing brings a man back to reality like changing a meconium poopy diaper. There is not really a smell, but the looks can make you wonder if your wife just gave birth to something that was part toad. But soon the diaper was changed and we were back to our time of just looking at each other in amazement. Well, at least I was in amazement. I'm not sure what Emma thought of me.

I think that probably one of the most difficult things about being a parent is worrying about what your child is thinking. Does she hate me? Does she think I'm fun? Does she think I am a goober? Is she embarassed of me (by the way, I quit sitting at the breakfast table with my shirt off)? Will she always be my sweet little baby girl?

Like all things the answers to your problems are in the Bible. Matthew 6:25-34 talks about how ridiculous it is to worry about things. I don't have too much of a problem worrying about my next meal or what shape my clothes are in or if I will have a cool and dry place to lay my head tonight. It is not the here and now that I am concerned about. It is the in a few years, in ten years, further down the road that I am worried about. And it is not about being concerned if I have been eating the right way or whether sitting my cell phone in my lap will put radiation in my body (although that does scare me a little bit). It is about worrying if I have done the right things for my little Emma. Have I scarred her for life by teaching her to pull my finger? Will she forever think I am weird for crying when I hear the Billy Joel Lullabye song? Am I being a good example for her each day? Does she pay attention when I am not a good example? Is she eating enough? Does she have everything she needs to succeed in life? I sometimes just sit and worry that I am going to screw things up for her and she will hate me when she's older. Don't try to patronize me either. We all see it every day. The neighbor's kid, somebody on the evening news, the kid around the corner from your grandparents. Kids are screwing up their lives every day and you have to wonder how much of it can be blamed on their parents.

Ok, Ok. I just need to calm down a minute. See what worry can do to you. The best verse of all for me from this passage about worry is Matthew 6:34 - "So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today."

So, is Jesus saying I can't even handle the things that happen today, so don't waste your time trying to worry about the problems I am going to have tomorrow? Yeah he is. Because I can't handle anything by myself.

I suppose the best thing my wife and I can do is to let her know everyday that God loves her and so do we. Let her know every day that she can trust in God to help her in times of need. She can depend on God to guide her throughout her life. We should let her know each day that she should place God first in her life and by doing so, everything else will fall into place. We should let her know that this doesn't mean she won't have struggles or bad days or scrapes on her knees, but if she allows God to be in her life everyday she won't have to worry about what is going to happen tomorrow.

Emma, I pray to God for the wisdom, strength, courage and guidance to be the best father I can for you. I will ask him for patience and kindness when I am not having the best of days, and I will ask him to remind me to laugh and giggle with you, and pin you down on the floor and tickle your neck until you can't stand it. I am so proud of you for the beautiful, sweet and loving little girl that you have become. I love you very much and I pray that you know and understand that and more importantly know that God loves you. Always keep God first in your life.

As Your children gather in peace
All the angels sing in Heaven
In Your temple all that I seek
Is to glimpse Your holy presence
All the heavens cannot hold You, Lord
How much less to dwell in me?
I can only make my one desire
Holding on to Thee

All the angels exalt You on high
What a kingdom to depart!
But You left Your throne in the sky
Just to live inside my heart
I will always make my one desire
Holding on to Thee

All the Heavens - Third Day

Happy Birthday My Little Angel! I love you very much!

Love,

Daddy

Making Disciples Out of Believers

You know, nothing really grabs your attention like a broken air conditioner in Florida in any month between May and October. Well, at least for me. I am definitely not a fan of the heat and I find it impossible to sleep when it is more than 80 degrees. Since being married I have continually been plagued by a broken air conditoner. Even when living in Oklahoma our air conditioner went out. In Tallahassee our air conditioner went out, just about every year something went wrong with it. And two years ago when we moved to our new home, you guessed it, something went wrong with the air conditioner. For me, having a broken air conditioner is a totally helpless feeling. It is no doubt going to be very costly. It always happens on the weekend and usually at night. But once the guy shows up and screws around for several hours and orders a part or goes back to the shop or flips a switch, who knows what they are going to have to do, but once they do it...life is good. The problem is gone. The once-a-year air conditioner "itch has been scratched."

Well, I would like to tell you a story that had a little bit different ending. A few months after we moved into our new house it happened. It was hot outside. It was in the evening and we had been out most of the night. We come home and it seems really hot. No, it is really hot. The air conditioner is not working, in fact, the little magical box on the wall in the hallway is not even lit up. Nothing makes me panic faster than a thermostat that won't even come on. So I dug out the phone book and looked up an A/C company with Emergency hours and finally I found one and I gave them a call. I had to leave a message and wait for the technician to call me back. So I get this phone call from this guy. He starts asking me what is going on with the unit and he says, "I have been at it since early this morning and I have two people in front of you. Let me tell you what to do to fix it." I was quite certain that the man was sitting there on the other end of the line with a red hot glowing crack pipe in his hand. You want to what, I said. He said, I am going to talk you through something and see if we can get your unit running tonight.

As he walked me through what needed to be done step by step, everything he asked me to look for was just as he described. Everything that he said would happen, happened. And about fifteen minutes later, cool air was blowing into my living room. I felt like crying, imagine that. The things the man talked me through should have been done all along, but no one had ever explained them to me. He also told me to be sure and replace the filter on a regular basis and make sure that I keep plenty of space around the unit in the garage and in the yard. Here is the most unbelievable part of all, it was all free of charge.

Imagine that, someone not only fixed my problem, but he taught me how to fix it myself and it cost me nothing. Each summer since that time, the same thing happens and I go through the same steps that he taught me and every time the air comes back on and things are good. Can you possibly imagine where I am going with this?

We all have troubles in our lives. And fortunately for some, we find out that there is someone out there that can fix our problems and make us all nice and comfortable again. For instance, some of us get that dark sinking feeling in our hearts and we start to feel sorry for ourselves and begin to wonder if any cares about us and it seems like things just keep piling up on us higher and higher. Or possibly we are dealing with other problems, like a deep seeded rage against someone who wronged us, with burning hot anger that invades our every thought and takes over our lives so that we are unable to get past our hatred for the one who wronged us. So we find ourselves visiting a church or meeting someone who is a Christian and they tell us, hey, God cares about you, God loves you, God will help you forget your pain, God will forgive you for what you have done in your life. We start to realize that we aren't alone and we start to feel better and begin to feel normal again. We understand God's sacrifice for us and we believe on Him.

BUT, quite often, we just get our problem fixed and we don't learn how to maintain our lives. We don't learn how to take that gift from God and use it when things start to go bad. We don't realize that we should apply the Lord's teachings to our lives on a regular basis.

Matthew 4:18-20 (NLT) - One day as Jesus was walking along the shore beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers - Simon, also called Peter, and Andrew - fishing with a net, for they were commercial fishermen. Jesus called out to them, "Come, be my disciples, and I will show you how to fish for people!" And they left their nets at once and went with him.

Here is what my bible commentary says (this is awesome), "Jesus told Peter and Andrew to leave their fishing business and begin fishing "for people," helping others find God. Jesus was calling them away from their productive trade to be productive spiritually. We all need to fish for souls. If we practice Christ's teachings and share the Good News with others, we will be able to draw those around us to Christ like a fisherman who pulls fish into his boat with nets."

We are called to be disciples and we are called to make disciples.

Matthew 28:18-20 (NLT) - Jesus came and told his disciples, "I have been given complete authority in heaven and on earth. Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.

If we don't study His teachings and renew our minds, we won't know God's will for us.

Romans 12:2 (NLT) - Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is.

2 Timothy 3:16-17 (NLT) - All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It straightens us out and teaches us to do what is right. It is God's way of preparing us in every way, fully equipped for every good thing God wants us to do.

Lord, I know that as a man I often just want things fixed quickly. I am so thankful that your disciples taught me that I am called to grow daily through the study of your Word. I am not only called to live a life of piety, but to study your Word daily, giving my mind to you, so that I will be prepared to take action when the opportunity presents itself. So that I will know and be prepared to defend my Christian beliefs. Lord, allow me to show others this as well. Give me the strength and courage to make disciples out of those I meet. And Lord, thank you for the man who took the time to show me how to take care of my air conditioner and to fix it when it starts to not work so well. You are truly an awesome God.

Please pray for Guidance for our Family

I don't want to go into too many details, but my family is weighing a huge decision over the next few days. We have been and are still praying about it a lot. I would simply ask that you say a quick prayer for us. Please pray that we are able to understand what God's will for our family is and go in that direction.

I can't tell you how honored I am to have such a wise and compassionate Christian wife. I have been inspired by a lot of people in my life, but no one has had such a dramatic impact on my life as my wife, Amy. No disrespect to you, Mom and Dad, or Conley and Becky, or anyone else that I am close to, but Amy has been a constant guide to me in my Christian walk. I am so thankful that God selected me to be the man who became her husband. I love how she loves me and my daughters and how she loves the Lord. I think she would do just about anything to help someone understand how wonderful it is to have a personal relationship with the Lord.

I love you Amy!

"He'll show life to you."

Today was a strange day. No complaints really, just strange. I have a new job that I like a lot. I am still trying to get used to the new routine, but my new co-workers are great.

For some reason as I sit here now, it feels strange. I feel like things in my life today were not connecting. I feel like I am walking around with a bubble suit on and everyone else is too. No one is connecting. We are all just bouncing along bumping in to each other occasionally, but not connecting.

I'm not sure what is going to happen with my church. I spend a lot of time being unhappy about how things are going and less and less time being happy about good things that are happening. I am concerned that it is because there are fewer and fewer good things happening. This really bothers me because often I try to make something positive out of everything. It is becoming harder and harder to make things out to be positive. Its really tough to know what to do. Every person should expect highs and lows in their lives, at their jobs, and even at their church. At what point does it stop becoming a temporary low and begin to become something that is just not right. I have a feeling I am about to find out.

Today I also got a lawn letter from the neighborhood association. If you know much about me, you probably know that a letter telling me that I am in violation of the neighborhood covenants because the weeds in my yard are excessive really doesn't go over too well. This is not my first letter since living in our new home. The first letter came at a time when it had rained for about two weeks straight with virtually zero time to mow the yard. And to make things worse, I had actually just had an opportunity to mow the day before the letter got to me in the mail. I was furious. I emailed, I tried calling, I ranted and raved over the nerve of sending me a violation letter when my yard had been cut even after weeks of wet weather. I sent a letter pointing out that the entrance to the neighborhood was in pretty poor shape and was doing more damage to the values of our homes than my yard. But you know, it now just seems pointless.

Yardwork is second to the top of the list of things I dislike. And yardwork in Florida between April and October is miserable. Sweating is #1 on the list. Nothing good comes out of yardwork. I have to spend time away from my wife and daughters during times when I would normally be with them. It is extremely hot 90% of the time. I get a migraine 80% of the time. I spend the remainder of the day trying to recover from the yardwork. Fire ants. Fire ants. Fire ants.

It's days like today that I need to take stock in my situation. I saw a marquee on a church the other day that said, "Count your blessings and then thank God for each one of them."

A few days ago I got to spend some time with some friends. We sang this song.

Have you seen Jesus my Lord? He's here in plain view.

Take a look, open your eyes; He'll show life to you.

Jesus,

I really don't understand why there has to be fire ants, but I am really sorry that my attitude sucks so bad. Sorry for saying sucks, but that is pretty much how it is. I'm sorry that I have not reflected your light today. I am sorry that I have been impatient and disconnected and selfish. You came down from your royal throne to take on the life of a human and accepted the most horrible treatment and then sacrificed your life on the cross for me. I suppose a fire ant bite is not nearly as bad as the pain you endured. I guess our days are not always great so when can feel all mopey and miserable and then reflect on your gift to us through your sacrifice and understand just how blessed our lives really are.

I am sorry for losing sight of what matters most.

Please guide me and my family to where you want us to go.

Amen

Something's missing

Do you ever really miss something? Right now I live pretty far from my parents and my brother and his kids. You kinda have to get used to not seeing them, when there is such a great geographical difference between you and your family. You also have to get used to missing other things like being around to go to OU home games or occasionally running in to friends from college or high school. Sometimes you just miss being in an environment that is familiar to you. But, you get used to it and you start to adapt to your new environment. You begin building new relationships and as is my case, building your own family.

But sometimes I find myself really missing things. This past week I have been troubled by a couple things that I miss. First, and most painful, I have really been missing our dog, Sunny. Sunny was the sweetest long-haired chihuahua you could ever meet. Amy, my wife, got Sunny as a puppy when we were in college about 13-14 years ago. Sunny was always by our side, always eager to sit in our laps, always loving to be petted, always looking at you with her big brown eyes wondering what you were going to do next. Sunny was an integral part of our family. Last year, Sunny died. It was one of the worst pains I have ever felt in my life. I know that my daughter, Emma, misses Sunny too, because she often talks about things that she remembers doing with Sunny. Sunny was a great friend and it pains me to even think about starting a new relationship with another dog. I am so afraid that it just won't be the same or even that we'll get attached and something bad will happen. I suppose that it just part of life and a risk worth taking. I do know that Sunny can never be replaced and will always be missed by our family.

I also have found myself missing another old friend. Another friend made in college. When I was a sophomore at OU, I had a roommate who rarely stayed in our apartment. I pretty much had a two bedroom apartment to myself for half the price. There was this guy named, Cad, who I was friends with. We were both in the marching band and we both spent a lot of time in the band room lounge in between classes. We had another friend, Autumn. We all had similar interests and got along pretty well. One day, as I was getting ready to go on a men's basketball pep band trip to the Big 8 tournament in Kansas City, I get a phone call from Cad. He had a flat tire on his way to the band room and he wondered if I could give him a ride. Little did I know that our friendship was beginning to grow to a new level. You see, Cad, commuted to school from another town and his car was just not handling the commute as well at it should. Cad ended up taking over my roommate's room and stayed with me for the rest of the year.

That summer we worked together and tragically, Cad's home was struck by lightning and got burned up pretty bad. He lived with me at my parent's house and we rode to work together. That summer we also took a rode trip. A trip I will never forget because I learned a great deal about Cad and I learned a great deal about the wonder of God's creation. Although at the time, I am not sure I was making the God connection. Cad was full of car tricks. He would suddenly scream at the top of his lungs, HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! Every time I would nearly die of a heart attack as I would look over to see him point at bales of hay on the side of the road. He also played a really good trick on me outside of Amarillo, Texas. We were driving and he reached over to turn the A/C over to Vent and he flipped the fan to High. Next thing I know the most awful stench is filling the car. We just drove into a huge cattle town and the smell would knock you over. I know because it lingered in the car for a long time.

But it wasn't all joking. We drove through the night and at one point out in the farthest reaches of west Texas Cad told me to pull the car over. He had something he wanted to show me. We pulled over and got out of the car. Cad said, "Look." I didn't see anything. I said, "I don't see anything." And Cad said, "I know, isn't awesome." We were in such a remote area that you could not see any lights whatsoever. No far off street light, no farm porch lights, no airplanes in the sky or oncoming cars. It was pitch black and completely serene. We just stood there and took in the whole experience. Cad was definitely thinking on a higher plane than I. At the time, I don't think Cad was a Christian, but I do believe that he was curious about the God who created such majestic beauty on this earth. We spent more time later on the trip taking in the beauty of the Rockies. At that time in my life, I was completely shallow and selfish and I don't think my mind was absorbing much of anything. Just ask my parents about my grades back then. But Cad introduced me to the notion that there were things beyond my little sphere that I needed to think about.

That next school year, Cad and I shared an apartment. We had lots of great times together, but I especially remember the times when the two of us, just sat alone in the darkness of our living room or maybe on a walk and shared our thoughts. I really miss my friend Cad.

Cad left school early to join the Navy. He spent his time in the Aleutian Islands. If you are not smarter than a fifth grader, just kidding, the Aleutian Islands are between Alaska and Russia and it is really cold there. A few years after Cad got out of the Navy, he married our friend, Autumn. Autumn was a very strong Christian and continually, yet kindly, let me know that there was more to life. Cad became a Christian and not long after their wedding, Amy and I moved to Florida. Since then we have been out of touch.

Cad's real name is Cadmus. I googled him a year or so ago and found his blog. He and my wife, she has a blog too, inspired me to start a blog. Uniquely enough, both my wife and Cad pushed me to grow personally. Cad introduced to me that there was more to life than what I was experiencing at the time and my wife gave me the confidence to attempt graduate school and succeed. I am extremely grateful to both of them. I have tried to contact Cad, but he either doesn't know I tried to reach him or doesn't want to be reached. I recently found out that he was starting a college and career program at a church he was attending. You will never guess what he wants to do. He wants to provide an outlet for college kids and 20 something kids to explore the concept of God, to ask questions that are definitely not stupid questions and to learn that as they are separating themselves from the grip of their parents that God is there to guide them through one of the toughest periods of their lives.

I suppose that the best way to ease the pain of missing someone is to consider yourself blessed to have had the chance to know them and learn from them. And move forward in your life feeling fortunate for the times you once had.

Sunny and Cad, I miss you.

Ephesians 5:15-20(NLT) So be careful how you live, not as fools but as those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity for doing good in these evil days. Don't act thoughtlessly, but try to understand what the Lord wants you to do. Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you. Then you will sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among yourselves, making music to the Lord in your hearts. And you will always give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Filling in the hole

There was this guy who led a pretty normal life. He was successful in his career, he was very handsome, never had a difficult time finding a date, and he always had plenty of money. One morning his alarm clock went off, but he just couldn't seem to find the motivation to get out of bed. Again, pretty normal behavior. The next morning the same thing. He found himself getting up later and later. Each day he found it more and more difficult to get himself out the door. He thought it had to do with the incredibly long hours he had been putting in at work. It also could have been his late nights out at the clubs that had him dragging. He couldn't quite put his finger on it.

Finally, one morning as he was again struggling to get going, he noticed that there was a hole in his chest. A deep and depressing hole. He looked at the hole and it seemed as though he could see his life slowly floating out of the hole. He couldn't quite explain the hole, but he thought perhaps focusing his mind on a new project at work would help him to forget about the hole. If the project went well, the bonus money would definitely get his mind off of the hole.

The project came and went, he did great, made tons of money, 30% of his enormous salary. Life couldn't be better. A few weeks later, he found himself again struggling to get moving one morning. Again he noticed the hole. This time it seemed as though more of his life was floating out. Perhaps he needed to reward himself for the hard work he had put in over the past month. A new sports car would definitely do the trick. He took the day off and spent it searching for the perfect car. Maybe he needed to upscale his image. This time it had to be a Mercedes.

The car was great and he looked great in it. It did wonders for his image. People at other firms were beginning to notice him. He was surely on his way up. But again, the newness of the car wore off and it seemed as though several people in his building had the same car. The hole was becoming more and more obvious to him. He was troubled by how empty he felt as he saw his life floating out of the hole. The success at his job, the money, the women, the new car, none of it was enough to keep his mind off of the hole. He had to find something to fill the hole.

He sat at his computer and began searching for stores that carried things to fill holes. He found a store that was just around the corner from him. Hole Fillers'r'us. He was off in a flash. As he entered the store he was immediately greeted by a sales clerk. Sir, we have anything and everything you could dream of to fill your hole. You just have to find the right fit to plug it up. First, I suggest you try to the Soul for Sale room. He led the man into a room full of various shaped blocks. Some blocks were shaped like dollar signs, some shaped like cars, some like houses, some like gold bars. He tried every one of them, but none of them matched his hole.

The clerk then suggested he try the Soul for Hire room. The blocks in the room could not be purchased. You had to work in the room to earn your block. The more projects you completed the bigger the block you could earn. The man spent hours working in the room, but even the biggest block didn't fit his hole. The clerk was beginning to see that the man was not having any luck. Perhaps you should just give up trying to fill your hole. Just go out and make your self as happy as you can, spend as much as you can earn and do whatever feels right. When you die you will have led your life to the fullest. The man halfway believed that might work and headed back to his home. The hole seemed to be getting bigger and deeper and darker. He was starting to panic a bit. What could he do? His life was pointless if he had to go from day to day with this huge hole in his heart.

The man trudged his way home back to his "fabulous" penthouse. As he entered his building, he was greeted by the doorman. The doorman, despite his menial job and limited resources, actually seemed to be pretty content. The man asked the doorman, how do you stand out here from day to day, in the frigid cold in the winters or the miserable heat in the summers, opening doors for people who don't even care to know your name and be so content.

The doorman was obviously a little hurt by his comments, but he quickly leaned over to the man and asked, Do you wake up every morning with a deep dark hole in your chest? A hole that seems so endless and hopeless and lonely. A hole that is cold and empty beyond belief.

The man seemed surprised. Yes, I do. Does that happen to you too?

No, I have the Lord in my heart. I know that despite all of my bad habits or failures in life and disappointments, God loves me. He loves me so much that he gave me this block to fill my hole. The doorman pulled a block shaped like a cross out of his pocket. Yeah, he gave me a block just like this one. This block is a promise to me that if I believe in the Lord and believe that he sent his son, Jesus, to earth to die on the cross for my sins, that I will have everlasting life. This job is not great, but I'm focusing my time on earth on living my life like Jesus did. Loving my neighbors, even the snooty ones who don't tip me in the middle of February. Christ died for each and every one of us and if we believe that and accept him as our savior we live with him eternally in heaven. Would you like to try this block and see if it fills your hole?

Acts 2:25-28 (NLT) King David said this about Him: 'I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. No wonder my heart is filled with joy, and my mouth shouts his praises! My body rests in hope. For you will not leave my soul among the dead or allow your Holy One to rot in the grave. You have shown me the way of life, and you will give me wonderful joy in your presence.'

Khaki shorts, a t-shirt and flip-flops

My wife and I have this running joke that we have to put on our uniforms when we are home in the evenings or on the weekend. My uniform typically consists of wearing one of about 3 different pairs of extremely comfortable (meaning not tight) khaki shorts, a dark blue t-shirt and if going out is required, my Addidas sliders. The flip flops with the thing in the middle of your toes doesn't work for me. I truly enjoy putting on my uniform. The shorts always feel great with big deep pockets and the t-shirts fit me just right. Occasionally I will wear short socks and running shoes, but even that is a bit much for me. Since moving to Florida about 10 years ago, I have discovered that this type of uniform can be worn year-round. Sometimes I am required to wear my long sleeve OU Sooner t-shirt, but only when its cool out.

Why on earth would I choose to tell you this. Well, I had the greatest opportunity last Friday night. I got to go with my wife to the House of Blues in Orlando and see a Third Day concert (Thanks Mimi and Papa!). Now, I listen to Third Day all of the time, but lately I have listened to the same CD over and over. But now, Third Day is giving their Chronology tour, which as you can imagine, is kind of like a greatest hits compilation. The concert was great. It was a praise and worship leader's dream worship service. Almost everyone in the house was standing up. Many were clapping their hands, swaying side to side and singing along with Mac (lead singer). It felt totally safe. No one was going to laugh at you or think you were hokey. No one was going to get into an argument or be rude to each other. Everyone was focused on hearing and experiencing the music. Everyone had love in their heart. Everyone was thinking in unison (at least I believe they were), "These guys are great, but even greater is their love for the Lord and their ability to move others to praise His name." It was, to say the least, very comfortable.

It was great to see my wife coming home and wanting to get out the older Third Day CD's that we have, so we could listen to the first songs that we loved so much. The songs that got us hooked on Third Day in the first place. You see there is no mistaking what Third Day is all about. Nearly every song is about either the life of Jesus, the message of love and eternal life that Jesus brought to us or the promise that the Holy Spirit will be with us for all of our days. Their songs are not politically correct or universal to all religions or easily masked as secular songs. There is no hiding with Third Day. They are in your face with God's love.

Psalm 145:14 (NLT) The Lord helps the fallen and lifts up those bent beneath their loads.

This is what my Bible commentary says "Sometimes our burdens seem more than we can bear, and we wonder how we can go on. David stands at this bleak intersection of life's road and meditates on the Lord, the great burden bearer. God is able to lift us up because (1) his greatness is beyond discovery;(2) he does mighty acts for each generation; (3) he is full of glorious splendor and majesty;(4)he does awe-inspiring deeds; (5) he is righteous;(6) he is kind, merciful, patient, loving and compassionate; (7) he rules over an everlasting Kingdom; (8) he is our source of all our daily needs; (9) he is righteous and kind in all his dealings; (10) he remains close to those who call on him; (11) he hears our cries and rescues us. If you are bending under a burden and feel that you are about to fall, turn to God for help. He is ready to lift you up and bear your burden. Praise takes our mind off our problems and shortcomings and helps us focus on God. Praise leads us from individual meditation to corporate worship. Praise causes us to consider and appreciate God's character. Praise lifts our perspective from the earthly to the heavenly."

Strange as it may seem, I think I could have only been made more comfortable at the concert if I had been wearing my khaki shorts and t-shirt. I truly experienced how wonderful it is to forget your worries, focus your thoughts and actions on praising God and share in the warmth of 2,200 people filled with the Holy Spirit. I kind of wondered if my face was glowing on the way home.

I caught a glimpse of Your splendor

In the corner of my eye

The most beautiful thing I've ever seen

And it was like a flash of lightning

Reflected off the sky

And I know I'll never be the same

*******

Show me Your glory

Send down Your presence

I want to see Your face

Show me Your glory

Majesty shines about You

I can't go on without You, Lord

*******

When I climb down the mountain

And get back to my life

I won't settle for ordinary things

I'm gonna follow You forever

And for all of my days

I won't rest 'til I see You again

*******

Show me Your glory

Show me Your glory

I can't live without You

Show me Your Glory - Third Day

Reigning Mercy

2 Corinthians 1:3-7 (NLT) All praise to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. He is the source of every mercy and the God who comforts us. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. You can be sure that the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ. So when we are weighed down with troubles, it is for your benefit and salvation! For when God comforts us, it is so that we, in turn, can be an encouragement to you. Then you can patiently endure the same things we suffer. We are confident that as you share in suffering, you will also share God's comfort.

Paul wrote this in a letter to the church in Corinth shortly after he had a little trouble in Asia. He says "We were crushed and completely overwhelmed, and we thought we would never live through it. In fact, we expected to die."

Man good thing stuff like that doesn't happen around here these days.

So it is Friday morning actually 5am and I can't manage to sit still any longer. My mind has been singing two Chris Tomlin songs all night long. Last night, my wife and our two girls went out for a ride. I had lost my Chris Tomlin CD for a long time and it was found last weekend during a wild cleaning moment. It is a great CD it is called See the Morning. Every song on there is great and sometimes Emma, my four year old likes to hear it. This is very important because if Emma deems a certain CD as appropriate for listening in our car even though it is not on the Disney approved listening list, we are very blessed. Emma likes this CD. I asked if we could listen to it and she said OK. She said she wanted to hear the United States song. Great, I get her to say she will listen to the CD and she thinks we are listening to something else, but then I thought a minute. Strangely enough, Emma calls "Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)," the United States song. I know she saw a part of the movie, Amazing Grace, that recently came out and this song is on the soundtrack to that movie and the Chris Tomlin video is played at the end of the movie. But I don't know why she calls it the United States song. Perhaps I will learn and tell you another day.

So, we are in the car listening to this song, which I know the Lord wanted us to hear. I know the Lord was just waiting for me to hear the words:

My chains are gone

I've been set free

My God, my Savior has ransomed me

And like a flood His mercy reigns

Unending love, Amazing grace

The Lord has promised good to me

His word my hope secures

He will my shield and portion be

As long as life endures

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow

The sun forbear to shine

But God, Who called me here below

Will be forever mine

Will be forever mine

You are forever mine

Because God wanted me to reflect on something miraculous that happened on that day, Thursday, February 21, 2008. My Good Friend had a special moment yesterday. Sometime around lunchtime, I am guessing, his nurse pulled out the IV giving him his final dose of chemo. And then a few "short" hours later, he was released from the hospital. That's right, the chains of lymphoma are gone. Sure he has a long struggle to regain his strength, but the hours upon hours of sitting in the hospital are gone (barring any small setback as he gets through the next few weeks). I think back to what Paul said, "We were crushed and completely overwhelmed, and we thought we would never live through it." I don't know if that is what my friend was thinking, but I know I would have been.

But what Paul said in verses 3-7 are true. My friend would say several times, "Strangely enough I feel kind of peaceful." Dude your hair is gone. Many times he would say, "Enough about me, how's your job search going?" Dude your eyebrows are gone and I think you might be wearing white lipstick. "So how are things going, is there anything that I can pray for you about? Do you want to pray right now?" He can't go to work, which he loves to do, he can't get out and work hard on his farm, which he loves to do, he can't roll around and tickle his boys, which he loves to do. He had to go and have this treatment every three or four weeks that made him stay in the hospital for 2-4 nights and then spend the next few weeks dodging every molecule of bacteria, fungus, or gunk that he could to stay healthy. Sure he got down at times, but he always seemed to remain peaceful. At least to me.

But here is what also happened. People reached out to him because they wanted to check on him and God allowed him to comfort others with the same comfort God had given him.

Another great song on the CD, Let Your Mercy Rain, has been pounding in my head all night long. I am not kidding. I had dreams with the music playing. Finally, I had to get up. I thought I was getting up because of a coughing fit that was keeping my wife awake, but once I sat down on the couch it started to come to me. I just needed to type a little note and thank God for giving me my Good Friend. I am glad you are home buddy.

God, You have done great things

God, You give grace to the weak

And bless the brokenhearted

With a song of praise to sing

You reached down and lifted us up

You came running, looking for us

And now there's nothing

And no one beyond Your love

You're the overflow

You're the fountain of my heart

Let Your mercy rain

Let Your mercy rain on us

You're the faithful one

When the world's falling apart

Let Your mercy rain

Let Your mercy rain on us

How deep, how wide, how long, how high is Your love ... is Your love

How deep, how wide, how long, how high is Your love ... is Your love

Oh, God

Let it rain

Tom Hanks, John Ortberg and a Jehovah's Witness walk into a blog...

I would imagine most have seen the movie, Castaway. It is the movie with Tom Hanks and Helen Hunt and Tom works for FedEx and his plane crashes in the middle of the ocean and he ends up on an island, makes a friend with a volleyball and eventually believes that he can leave the island to return to Helen. He leaves the island, drifts for 500 miles in the ocean, gets picked up by a freight ship, comes back home and finds that Helen is now married and his sole reason for keeping himself alive all this time is no longer there for him.

It is such a strange experience to watch this movie. I just watched the last hour of it. I have seen it several times. Once I turn it on, I can't stop watching it. And I know what it is. Once the plane crashes there is very little talking that goes on for quite some time. All you hear is the sounds of the ocean with Tom occasionally talking to himself. It really makes me stop and think.

A few years ago, the idea of solitude was first introduced to me. At the time, I could barely grasp the concept. I immediately thought of this movie. I even made the picture for this blog back when I was beginning to learn about solitude. That was about as far as I got in creating my own interpretation of what solitude meant to me.

As I have mentioned before, I have had an experience that has inspired me to shift my priorities in life. I am now trying to put God first in my life. A couple things in the past couple months have assisted me in formulating a better idea of what solitude means to me. My sunday school class recently previewed a few chapters of a John Ortberg book called "The Life You've Always Wanted." One of the chapters talked about God being a fatherly figure in our lives. John Ortberg talked about watching his wife or his kids while they sleep and thinking wonderful thoughts about them and desiring the best for them in their lives. John pointed out that this is what God does while each one of us is sleeping. This thought had never entered my brain before. I guess I never thought about God looking over me as I slept and my first thoughts were that he would be saying, "Maybe tomorrow you can do better. Maybe you have learned your lesson from being such an idiot today. Maybe you'll remember to talk to me before you come up with one of your "brilliant" plans that your wife can sniff out in a second. Thank goodnes you have finally gone to sleep." Did I think God would say those things to me????Maybe. Maybe in a mentoring kind of way. But the book and the Bible tell me that God is my Heavenly Father. No loving father thinks bad things about their kids while they watch them sleep. It really caused me to think differently about my relationship with God. The more I put myself into his Word, the more I begin to see just how much He loves me.

So I now am understanding better the love of God. I am also learning to talk with God more. We are now in the mystical season of Lent. Why do I say that? People give up things for Lent, watching too much TV, drinking coffee, cursing, chocolate, alcohol, you name it. I like to think of it as our second chance at your New Year's resolution, but this time there is a catch. I you slip up you go to hell. Just kidding. But that is the mystique. I have been doing these things in excess my whole life, they are probably shortening my life by ten years, but I just keep doing them. But for the next 40 days I will stop doing them because I am afraid of what God will do to me if I slip up. Besides I only have to wait until Easter and then I can get back to the things I love. Quite honestly before this year I have to say I was one of those people. But now I am perfect. OK not really. Now I have finally learned what the challenge truly is during Lent. I gave up a few things and vowed to do a few things. But this time it is different. I obviously don't want to fail, but I actually gave up a few things that put me out of my comfort zone. Who am I trying to kid? They have to do with food. But when I think about that I have to miss out on something, I need to remember to pray to God and thank him for the blessings in my life. Pray for the strength to uphold my Lenten vows. I also have to pray each morning to remind myself of my sacrifices because if I don't Satan is ready waiting to slip one by me.

Is there a point to this? Have you just wasted a good five minutes of your time because I am not going anywhere with this blog? Yes there is.

I am learning to talk to God in the quiet times, during the drive to work, in the mornings before I eat breakfast, in the late hours of the night, when I am tempted, when I am sad, when I am confused, when I am concerned. I am learning to develop my relationship with the Lord. At the same time I am learning what it means to put God first in my life. I am not always doing a good job of it, but I am ever more conscious of what it means.

And I am able to defend my beliefs. When I was a kid, a couple came to our door and wanted to talk with me about life. They wanted to give me a couple little magazines to read and maybe they could come back later and find out if I had any questions. I knew that Jehovah's Witness people came door to door and new the name "The Watchtower," but I really didn't know what to say to them. I thought I would humor them and take their magazine and listen to what they had to say, but I also knew I would never buy in to what they were trying to do. Later in life, I would just not answer the door or would tell them I was not interested. If I was feeling really bold I might tell them I go to church and I believe in God and Jesus and all that stuff. But honestly I didn't know what to say to them and I certainly didn't need to get myself into any conversations like that. I do plenty of that on my own.

But Friday something different happened. I had to stay home from work because my wife was sick and I needed to watch our girls, which never happens. (Kwinky-dink or divine appointment (as my preacher would say). You decide, I know the answer). So I am sitting in the living room with the girls and someone knocks at the door. A Friday mid-morning and someone is knocking at our door? I knew exactly who it was (well that and a new JW church was just built near our house). The girls and I opened the door and there was a woman with two small children. The little kids asked if I had little kids and wanted to know if I wanted to have a couple little magazines that would tell them how to keep safe. I looked over and saw a kid's magazine and a Watch Tower magazine. I said, Yes I do have little kids, but we go to a church where they learn to love the Lord Jesus and learn that God sent him to this world to die for our sins and that if they believe on Him they will have everlasting life. Then the woman said, This is not about church. Don't you want to protect your children from child molesters? I looked her in the eye and said, I will protect my little girls by raising them in the right way, teaching them wrong from right and praying to God every day that he protects them. She looked like she didn't know what to say. She turned the little kids around and said have a nice day. I closed the door and did a dance that I am certain my wife and daughters would prefer I not do in public. I felt great. I finally was able to say to someone. Hey you got it all wrong and I will not be deceived. I firmly believe that is a direct result of me learning to have solitude with the Lord.

Then my wife, fever and all, got out of her bath robe, got completely dressed in two seconds and walked half a block down the street to invite the woman to her Bible study. OK. I am going to have to work on that one.

Lord, I love what you are doing in my life. I love finding out how much you love me and I love learning more and more about you. I pray that you will take this knowledge and turn it into wisdom for me to live my life. Lord please give me the strength and focus to uphold my Lenten vows to you. And Lord, please protect my daughters from evil.

2 Peter 1:3-11 (NLT) As we know Jesus better, his divine power gives us everything we need for living a godly life. He has called us to receive his own glory and goodness! And by that same mighty power, he has given us all of his rich and wonderful promises. He has promised that you will escape the decadence all around you caused by evil desires and that you will share in his divine nature.

So make every effort to apply the benefits of these promises to your life. Then your faith will produce a life of moral excellence. A life of moral excellence leads to knowing God better. Knowing God leads to self-control. Self-control leads to patient endurance and patient endurance leads to godliness. Godliness leads to love for other Christians, and finally you will grow to have genuine love for everyone. The more you grow like this, the more you will become productive and useful in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But those who fail to develop these virtues are blind or, at least, very shortsighted. They have already forgotten that God has cleansed them from their old life of sin.

So, dear brothers and sisters, work hard to prove that you really are among those God has called and chosen. Doing this, you will never stumble or fall away. And God will open wide the gates of heaven for you to enter into the eternal Kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Count the Lord's Blessings

There I was sitting in my car reading a book about preparing for a job interview. This little yellow sticky folded in half and laminated falls out of the book. It turn it over and it says in really nice cursive writing, "Count the Lord's Blessings." I suppose I should have known right then what the outcome of my interview would be, but I tried to read into it and come up with some interview strategy in which my answers would be focused on the blessings from the Lord that I have received in my life. One of the problems with being a hopeless optimist is that you often are blindsided by reality. Sometimes it really hurts.

Those of you that know me most likely know that I had an interview last week. Today I received the "Dear John" letter, because my name is John. No it wasn't a letter from my sweetheart back in the states telling me that she met a nice boy who works at the grocery store. It was a letter telling me that while my resume was very impressive I was not what they needed for the job. I'm not bitter at the people who sent the letter, just blindsided.

I have to say that despite the really bad feeling that I have inside right now, the situation could be much worse. My life has taken a Mighty change for the better over the past few months. I have through the Holy Spirit been awoken (not really sure if that is the correct way to put it, but you know what I mean). My priorities have become clear. Put God first in my life, then comes my promise to my wife to be by her side until the end, be a Christian father to my beautiful little girls and love everyone in my path. By filling my mornings with studying God's word, my thoughts throughout the day are more likely to be Godly than worldly. I am learning to express myself better and have confidence in myself that I didn't have before. I have continued to have a feeling in my heart that no matter what happens things will work out.

When I sat down here tonight, I was going to write about rejection and how it must have felt to be Jesus and to be rejected by your own hometown. But I was quickly reminded of the little yellow sticky. I can sit here and type all of my blessings, but it might seem as though I was bragging. I am so blessed in my life. That little note was probably some of the best interview advice I have ever received. No offense to my good buddy and my wife (she's my good buddy too) who gave me some great advice about interviewing and being prepared. But for now, I am going to sit quietly and thank God for his grace he has poured upon me in my life. My eternal vacation plans should be enough to fill me, but he has provided me with so much more.

I will get started again soon trying to find that next perfect opportunity. For now I have a good job and it will have to do until it is time for me to move on to something else.

Romans 5:1-5 (NLT) - Therefore, since we have been made right in God's sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us. Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of highest privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God's glory.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us - they help us learn to endure. And endurance develops strength of character in us, and character strengthens our confident expectation of salvation. And this expectation will not disappoint us. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

Goodness, Ash Wednesday is quickly approaching thus the beginning of Lent. Will you and I really test our endurance? Better yet will we be mindful of our gift of eternal life and allow some of our worldly needs to become dead to us.

Lord, I thank you for the many ways that you continue to bless my life. I hope I did not disappoint you by being really excited about the possibility of getting a new job. Please allow me to find a way to bring you to my current job and to remember the new priorities in my life.

My Daughter the Musical Prodigy

I suppose it is no surprise that I am the very proud father of two perfect little girls. I must tell you about my 4 year old, Emma. She is truly a genius. It is amazing to me how quickly she picks up on things. She can listen to a song a few times and before you know it, she can sing back the words to the song. Now, like all of us, she can get a word mixed up here and there. Like she used to sing "there's not a star in heaven that we can't beach." I love it when she does that, but eventully she figures that out and corrects herself.

Emma loves High School Musical. If you don't know what that is I will tell you. HSM at it is known by the serious Disney enthusiasts is a musical that is comparable to Grease, however, I believe it is geared more towards a younger crowd with no profanity whatsoever and maybe one scene with kissing. Very tame and actually has a good moral to the story.

Ok, so now you know. Emma (and Caitlin our 2 year old) love HSM. They love to watch the movies (there has been a sequel). They especially love to sing the songs and dance around the living room to the music. I have to admit, the music is pretty catchy and some of the kids acting in the movie are pretty good. My favorites are Ryan and Sharpay. They steal the show from Troy and Gabriella, the two main characters. Not that I am really in to it that much. I mean I would much rather be watching football or something like that. I have no control over the TV.

Ok, I really like it alot. I know, I know. Crying about opera songs, folding towels like Martha Stewart and thoroughly enjoying musicals. I really can't explain it.

Back to HSM and Emma. Emma really knows her HSM songs. She has the soundtracks and she knows all of the words. It amazes me how she can repeat words and phrases that most likely mean nothing to her, at least I hope they don't. Don't get me wrong the musical is very clean and family friendly, but I don't want my four year old having a thought in her head about being in love with some dreamy boy. I know that she doesn't and it is all very innocent. I am more concerned about her excellent ability to recall what she hears.

It seems as though we are at our best and our worst around our kids. I couldn't have been more happy and proud of my girls this past weekend at Disney World. But there are definitely times when everyone gets tired and Daddy makes an idiot out of himself by trying to make a point or draw the line on some issue. Is Emma rembering these things that I say and do at these times?

Why wouldn't she? Is she remembering when I say something stupid to someone driving like a maniac on the interstate (first of all she would tell me not to say stupid)? Is she listening as I express my disdain for the flowery male figure skater with a flair for drama on TV (OK, I did not turn on the figure skating and I really was not into it)? Is she listening when I say something about a presidential candidate, an Oklahoma State (or Texas or Florida State or USC) football player, a person who gets on my nerves or even her mom when an argument is happening?

Of course she is.

I was reading over something I had written a couple months ago.

Ephesians 4:29-32 (NLT) says this, Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

John 13:34-35 - (This is Jesus speaking to the disciples just after Judas left the upper room) So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.

When am I going to get it. It is so hard for me to be compassionate and loving to those who are hardest to love. I sometimes fail at being compassionate and loving to those who I love very much. It is not just affecting me and my attitude, it is being forced upon my daughter who is gathering everything she sees and hears.

I have to change.

Ephesians 5:15-17 (NLT) So be careful how you live, not as fools, but as those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity for doing good in these evil days. Don't act thoughtlessly, but try to understand what the Lord wants you to do.

I really like this verse in the NLT version:

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 - Always be joyful. Keep on praying. No matter what happens, always be thankful, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.

Lord, I am sorry for not being the best example possible for my little girls. Let me shine your light to all and let my little girls do the same. Please let me use your Word as a reminder of how I should live my life, both in word and deed.

"Have you seen my....."

Anytime that I am driving to work and my phone rings I can automatically tell you the first five things that will be said, "Johnny, have you seen my." And then something that must be had in order for my lovely wife to proceed with her day is stated...car keys, wallet, cell phone, etc. Today, it was her brown sweater. You see, my wife and I are perfectly suited to each other. She at times cannot find things that are essential to her doing what she needs to do. She is so focused on what she is doing with our girls or with something she is trying to get accomplished that she might lose track of something that she will need later. I know it will sound as though I am trying to do some brown-nosing here, but what I am about to say is true and is one of things that makes her so special to me. My wife always knows where she is going, what she is trying to accomplish and what she wants to do. She may not know where she left her car keys, but she sure knows what she wants to accomplish for the day, and for her life.

Now for me, it is a completely different story. I have to work hard to remember what it is that I am trying to accomplish. I am not a complete idiot, but there are times when I can get sidetracked from getting sidetracked. I can get up an hour early for work and still walk in five minutes later than I would like to. But if you have lost something and I have seen it within the past month or so, I can pretty much tell you where it is. I have this very strange ability to remember seeing things especially if they are not in their normal place. I am not sure how I do it, but I can tell you right now that there are 2-3 pieces of mail in the passenger side door of our car that I have not had a chance to look at yet. My wife's sweater was hanging in the laundry room (actually it had fallen off of the hanger, but it was still in the laundry room). It really only works for my wife though. I can tell her where to find her watch, her phone, earrings, shoes, remote control (though even I can't remember where that goes sometimes).

I am not trying to brag about my memory. I am just amazed at how incredible God is. I can just see it, 12-13 years ago, God is setting up some future marriage matches and he finds the following biography cards.

Amy - beautiful, inside and out, always knows where she is going, very level headed, smarter than she thinks, slender, and sometimes can't find her wallet.

John - nice guy, doesn't have a clue where he is going or how he is going to get there, but knows that in the end he will be right where he needs to be, chubby, OCD.

God looks over the two cards. Hey these two know each other, maybe just maybe, Amy can straighten this guy out and the two of them can accomplish great things together. I'll make sure the kids get her looks and figure. He can at least keep track of where the car is parked.

Genesis 2:18-24 (NLT) - And the Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion who will help him." So the Lord God formed from the soil every kind of animal and bird. He brought them to Adam to see what he would call them, and Adam chose a name for each one. He gave names to all the livestock, birds and wild animals. But still there was no companion suitable for him. So the Lord God caused Adam to fall into a deep sleep. He took one of Adam's ribs and closed up the place from which he had taken it. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib and brought her to Adam. "At last!" Adam exclaimed. "She is part of my own flesh and bone! She will be called 'woman,' because she was taken out of man." This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

I love the comments in my Bible about this passage. "God forms and equips men and women for various tasks, but all these tasks lead to the same goal - honoring God. Man gives life to the woman; woman gives life to the world. Each role carries exclusive privileges; there is no room for thinking that one sex is superior to the other."

So every time my phone rings on my way to work, I am so thankful for my wife. I am truly blessed that God matched us up.

"Hope is a good thing."

Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.

That's the beauty of music. They can't get that from you... Haven't you ever felt that way about music?

I played a mean harmonica as a younger man. Lost interest in it though. Didn't make much sense in here.

Here's where it makes the most sense. You need it so you don't forget.

Forget?

Forget that... there are places in this world that aren't made out of stone. That there's something inside... that they can't get to, that they can't touch. That's yours.

What're you talking about?

Hope.

These are a couple quotes from the movie, The Shawshank Redemption. I often wonder why they can't make a movie without a lot of profanity. I would not hesitate to refer everyone I know to watch this movie, if they haven't already, but it is a little rough at times when it comes to the language. This is unfortunate, because the theme of the movie is something that many of us need to be reminded of every day.

I guess there are different kinds of hope. There is the kind like, I hope I get a bike for Christmas or I hope it doesn't rain this afternoon or I hope I am not tired in the morning from staying up so late typing on the computer.

Then there is the hope that you really don't put into words. To me, hope is like an awareness that these things that I go through from day to day are not in vain. It means to me that there is a promise waiting for me that will be so worth the wait. It is hard to explain, but it is just a confidence that this will all have a happy ending. Everything will be OK.

Most of the time when you say that, people think you need a reality check. They think that you don't know what you are talking about and you haven't been through anything that would make you believe that things may not end happily. Maybe they are right. Maybe for them, the promise of peace and joy is just not a reality. I suppose that is what creates those voids in people's lives. The sunken feeling inside that we all desire to fill with something. Something that satisfies us and pacifies us. I guess that is where the other hope comes in to play. I must admit at times I get a bit disillusioned as well. I lose sight of my hope and I have to replace it immediately with something. This must be where we get off track. When we start following the path of the quick fixes to our lack of peace and happiness and stop relying on God to guide us in His path.

I have been so blessed in my life. A wonderful family, an awesome wife, two "perfect" little girls, great friends. Thank you God for these blessings.

This past Sunday, a man in our Sunday School class talked about the struggles that he and his wife had gone through in trying to have a child. It was obvious that this time period in his life was very painful. But they kept on believing and things finally worked out in the end. He told us that he felt great comfort in reading Psalms 25. So we read Psalms 25. As soon as we began reading it, I was hearing the words to one of my favorite Third Days songs called My Hope Is You. It goes like this:

To you, O Lord, I lift my soul.

In you, O God, I place my trust.

Do not let me be put to shame.

Nor let my enemies triumph over me

My hope is you

Show me your ways

Guide me in Truth

In all my days

My hope is you

I am, O Lord, filled with your love

You are, O God, my salvation

Guard my life and rescue me

My broken spirit shouts

My mended heart cries out...My hope is you

Me, in my infinite Bible knowledge, never knew where the words to this song came from. I mean I know that they get nearly all of their lyrics from the Bible, but I don't always know where they come from.

What a wonderful thing for this man to share with us. Whatever has got you down today, please take a moment and remember the promise God has given to us. Remember that hope IS a good thing and good things never die.

Romans 15:13 (NLT) So I pray that God, who gives you hope, will keep you happy and full of peace as you believe in Him. May you overflow with hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.

If You Build It They Will Come. But Will They Come Back?

I feel wonderfully blessed to have a wife who understands and enjoys sports. My wife is a huge St. Louis Cardinals fan and an even bigger OU Sooner fan. In fact, we both met while attending the University of Oklahoma. We were both in the marching band. Her family has followed the Sooners as long as she can remember. I think I liked them when I was younger, but I knew when I got to school at OU that I would be a Sooner forever. We both love to watch the Sooners win football games and we both get terribly depressed when they lose. Unfortunately this year, we had to watch them lose in their bowl game against West Virginia. Hopefully next year will be an even better year.

Back to my wife. She is a great sports fan. She even got me a Cubs hat autographed by Ryne Sandberg for my wedding present. By the way, I am a kinda big Cubs fan. I am always proud to tell other guys how lucky I am that my wife likes sports. My wife also loves movies about sports. She loves the movies that tell a great story like The Natural, Miracle (1980 Olympic Hockey movie) and Field of Dreams.

The title of this post really doesn't make any sense because I was going to talk about something that has bothered me at my church, but I really don't think God would find it as a good use of my time. This is what I feel needs to be said tonight.

Tomorrow I will be teaching Sunday school at my church for the first time. There is an excellent chance that it will just be me and my wife, but I think I will try to teach anyways. I am teaching out of a book by John Ortberg called The Life You've Always Wanted. Tomorrow's lesson is about the need to take notice when God is trying to get your attention, stop what you are doing and follow his lead. Just like Moses did when he saw the burning bush and ended up leading the Israelites out of Egypt. I am continually haunted by the thought that every homeless person that I pass by is Jesus waiting on me to take notice and do something. I am even more disgusted with myself because today I was in a gas station buying something to drink for my family. There was a lady sitting down behind the counter closing out her register sobbing. The man who rang me up was standing right next to her. He was obviously affected by whatever was causing the girl to cry, but he stuck to his job as if to give her privacy and hopefully not allow her to disturb any customers. I avoided looking at her. I felt this urge to say something to her like "Is everything OK? or Is there anything that I can do for you? or Can I pray for you?" Instead I tried not to make eye contact and left the store even though my heart was telling me to stop and try to give the woman some sign that whatever is going wrong for her today, God still loves her and there are people in this world who love her too and that things will eventually get better.

Even as I got into the car and told my wife about it, my heart was telling me to go back inside and say something to her. What if today was her last day to live either because she went home and killed herself or because some accident happened to her?

Colossians 3:12 (NLT) Since God chose you to be the holy people whom he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.

James 2:14-17 (NLT) Dear brothers and sisters, what's the use of saying you have faith if you don't prove it by your actions? That kind of faith can't save anyone. Suppose you see a brother or sister who needs food or clothing, and you say "Well, good-bye and God bless you; stay warm and eat well"-but then you don't give that person any food or clothing. What good does that do?

So you see, it isn't enough just to have faith. Faith that doesn't show itself by good deeds is no faith at all - it is dead and useless.

My bible commentary on this last scripture says this, "When someone claims to have faith, what he or she may have is intellectual assent - agreement with a set of Christian teachings - and as such it would be incomplete faith. True faith TRANSFORMS our conduct as well as our thoughts. If our life remains unchanged, we don't truly believe the truths we claim to believe."

It is really easy to sit here in the quiet at my computer and type about how I want to go out and have an impact on every person I come in contact with, but as soon as I walk out the door and my personal wants, needs and problems get in the way all bets are off.

Lord, I don't want to learn this lesson the hard way. Please forgive me for not reaching out to that poor crying woman. Please be with her and have mercy on her and provide her with comfort and peace. Please continue to tug on my heart when I need to stop what I am doing and take notice of what you are doing. Please forgive me for being a hypocrite, Lord. I will do better tomorrow. And Lord, thank you for my wife even though she is a Cardinals fan. I am truly blessed.